Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
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