I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I believe in your delicious
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Randomize
