Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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