we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
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So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
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I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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