Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
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