I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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