If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Randomize
