fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
