I wanna passion pit in your ass
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
