It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
