It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
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