he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Randomize