I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
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