ugly people sure do ruin things
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize