Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
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