Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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