wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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