you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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