yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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