is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Randomize
