we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The chlamydia really affected his face.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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