He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Mom said you looked used
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
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