do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
