I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Randomize
