i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
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