oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
