No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
