I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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