I feel great
I just peed on a car
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
this boner is exhausting
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
