But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
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