There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
