will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize