true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize