Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
