so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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