Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
