I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
