Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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