mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize