its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
how drunk are you?
Several
Randomize
