id be glad to
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
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Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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