Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Randomize
