I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
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