So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
