fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone stole a lamp last night.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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