so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
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