Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
