Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
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