he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
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