Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
